No
![Crying or Very sad :cry:](./images/smilies/icon_cry.gif)
I really hate this... I am thinking of deleting elma... tonight I have been battling... why do I suck... why is life black.. why is sex not here right now... why does life sucks... why does I feel a need to cruz unimportant levels (that is: ALL LEVELS), why is joy fake, why is nothing real... what can I know, is it really elma? or is it just me, my brain, and its strange behaviour? have I any chance at all to get a ok life... when will God speak to me, whu does elma be in my life... why does she (elma is girkname, ok) wake me at nights, why does she asking about all this care (levelmaking) why cant she just shut up? why dont I go to Maria? Will I jump on a train tomorrow? will the train (if I take it, crash... if not... why shall I live? to get some sex?) even reach fbg in time... and if it doesn´t... why shoul dI care. all I have is time. Why should I take thje train.. will it make me a happier Boy? will it change my life... will it kill Emla? will elma cheat on me? Maria never do... why do I pay attention to Elma then? I cant trust her... she sucks... so does life... elma is part of life...
SO, what was the question? anyone know... does it even matter? Is elma good for anyone... and if it is, what is good then: Goos must be subjective... so how can we really use the word, it means different to all (I guess) we just think we know what others mean. Ho wcan we... all we hear is words... that is all... all I do is think.. what are my thoughts really worth... why do I let them run free... is it my thoughts... ho wcan I tell... and if it aint my thoughts, ho wcan I knwo elma ruins my life... maybe it is just Abula sitting and playing with my mind like DmD playes with elma... maybe it is all in my head but created by someone else... so, why do I care... if I cant really know anything... why shoul dI even life? well.. the feeling of freedom shoul dbe enough I think... freedom is not so important... I think feelong free is.. di I feel free? yes... and (of course) no. There are many reasons for this... for instance the state... how shall I know if it is good for freedom or not.. how can my little mind (if even controlled by me) tell wether the State is prefered... me is shit.. elma is shit.. elma fucks life.. I fuck in life, I fuck in dreams, I fuck world world is apart of me, and vice verse... Elm aaint very good for me I think (what think is?) I just feel confuzed... I hate it.. why cant anything be simple? Not even sesx is simple... we dont have sex like animals... there is so much more to it... but, would I want it liek animals.. and... how can I say that... some may have it like that.. who are me (who am I?) to judge... I can only guess (can I?)... my guess is... elma fucks my life... And Maria is the best looking Girl in the wolrd.. but still... looks is of no importance... only makes you think.... so ... why should I care? I do, but why?
Elma sucks anyway, or.. is it school?
I bet it is me... (not a bet for money though)
think for yourself[/i]