timezone trouble

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tej
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timezone trouble

Post by tej » 5 Nov 2019, 04:00

hello beloved elma community.

i have for a couple years now been struggling with different timezones that all have their flaws.

now i live in toronto and i find that at my most chill hours i'm hanging out by myself!

for some proof just go to #battle on discord and search something like "tej any battlers" and be saddened by the evidence of me up late at night waiting for all the europeans to wake up.

anyways, i'm not here to just be upset over problems and not offer any solutions! i've come up with the solution, and i will explain it to you now.

take a look at this.

Image

that is the world, and you may know a little about it but i'll tell you how it works. i am living on the left side, and most elma players are living on the right side. anyways, here's the solution.

unfortunately, the solution will not be free of sacrifices. but i'll definitely not be sacrificing myself, that's for sure! the most obvious first step is to remove quebec from the picture.

Image

alright, now that that is done, let's consider how we might attack this timezone problem.

in the next image i've highlighted some area that i'm willing to let go.

Image

sorry, fish and greenland. you are very in the way and i'll just need that space.

alright, in this image i've highlighted an area that we will use a cutting device to make a large incision to the surface of the world.

Image

i've left all the land alone this time, so no non-aquatic sacrifices will need to be made here.

now that we've made the cut, we're just going to slide the old world right up beside the new one.

Image

ok, so there might be some questions. i'll do my best to answer the ones i can foresee.

Q: what happened to the central american pacific islands?
A: they had to be removed to make way for the beautiful deserts of northwest africa.

Q: where will the people of french guinea go?
A: i am not sure, but they will definitely need to go somewhere. luckily large endless sand dunes will end up very close to their current location.

Q: why does the old world have to move, why can't you come over to us?
A: i honestly think that we can come to a good compromise. instead of switching who has to move, let's redefine the longitudinal lines so that it appears as if the west moved eastward, instead.

Q: what is happening in the southern hemisphere during this move?
A: i did not find a map of what is down there, so i hadn't considered it until i thought of this question. really any number of solutions can be found, but we'll leave that to them to decide when we begin the move.

in case any people are left in bad conditions due to the shift we are going to be doing here, i've decided to return the empty glacier of greenland to the map. i decided to move it closer to the equator to ensure the land is more inhabitable, and hopefully people can settle there effectively.

Image

alright, let me know if you have any improvements to the plans i've put forward here.

we should be able to all play in similar timezones in no time at all!

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AndrY
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Re: timezone trouble

Post by AndrY » 5 Nov 2019, 08:59

ow what you smoked tej? atlantic ocean is expanding now, how you want to collapse it?

read Jule Verne, there is a easier decicion imo. you just have to turn the planet to move the Earth axis to the USA. but need some money for such things
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Re: timezone trouble

Post by kuchitsu » 5 Nov 2019, 10:30

I was thinking perhaps we could buy one of these Pacific islands and set up a permanent location for people to visit and play battles all day. How much money does one need to buy an island nowadays?

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pawq
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Re: timezone trouble

Post by pawq » 5 Nov 2019, 11:02

Hahah, brilliant! :D I'm all for it. While you're at it tej, why don't you take Australia and nz and squeeze it into the north Pole hole so that they're not stuck 12h away too? They complain of the heat all the time, that would solve that too :>

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Re: timezone trouble

Post by Zweq » 5 Nov 2019, 11:37

an easier solution might be remove timezones altogheter and become a nocturnal creature
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Grace
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Re: timezone trouble

Post by Grace » 5 Nov 2019, 11:49

Yes, please remove AU heat
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Re: timezone trouble

Post by AndrY » 5 Nov 2019, 11:55

stop the planet? sounds good
although all ideas are norm
btw no need to worry about resources. there are still unused fem extra money, dont forget
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Re: timezone trouble

Post by Lousku » 5 Nov 2019, 12:35

tej for president
then again i don't know anything
maybe easier not to think abouut alöl things thought than not things thought ... or something..=?

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pawq
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Re: timezone trouble

Post by pawq » 5 Nov 2019, 12:37

Lousku wrote:
5 Nov 2019, 12:35
tej for president
heh, that made me think... I'm pretty sure that a substantial proportion of trump's electorate would support him for proposing updating the map so that they have a smaller time zone difference to allies and bigger to enemies.

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ArZeNiK
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Re: timezone trouble

Post by ArZeNiK » 5 Nov 2019, 14:23

genius idea
hi im arzenik :>
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gimp
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Re: timezone trouble

Post by gimp » 5 Nov 2019, 16:31

How will you move the earth around?
God Bless America

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Ruben
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Re: timezone trouble

Post by Ruben » 6 Nov 2019, 00:57

Cookie cutter
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Re: timezone trouble

Post by Chris » 6 Nov 2019, 18:21

That's fantastic :>
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tej
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Re: timezone trouble

Post by tej » 7 Nov 2019, 02:57

pawq wrote:
5 Nov 2019, 11:02
hahah, brilliant! :d i'm all for it. while you're at it tej, why don't you take australia and nz and squeeze it into the north pole hole so that they're not stuck 12h away too? they complain of the heat all the time, that would solve that too :>
grace wrote:
5 Nov 2019, 11:49
yes, please remove au heat
ok i will need to do some research to find a map of south of world, and then possibly i will discover what you mean by australia and nz. they are warm places you say, so i am concerned that putting them in the north will make them a bit bad for their animals.
andry wrote:
5 Nov 2019, 08:59
ow what you smoked tej? atlantic ocean is expanding now, how you want to collapse it?

read jule verne, there is a easier decicion imo. you just have to turn the planet to move the earth axis to the usa. but need some money for such things
the world had no right to make the atlantic so big, so i think it is fair to reduce it.
kuchitsu wrote:
5 Nov 2019, 10:30
i was thinking perhaps we could buy one of these pacific islands and set up a permanent location for people to visit and play battles all day. how much money does one need to buy an island nowadays?
i looked it up, and islands are like $ 100 m, which is outside of our price range.
zweq wrote:
5 Nov 2019, 11:37
an easier solution might be remove timezones altogheter and become a nocturnal creature
i think we will have an easier time moving continents than convincing morning people to sleep in.
gimp wrote:
5 Nov 2019, 16:31
how will you move the earth around?
no, we will move things on the earth using scissors etc.
lousku wrote:
5 Nov 2019, 12:35
tej for president
i'm not willing to hang out with body guards all the time, i need some space.

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Re: timezone trouble

Post by Chris » 7 Nov 2019, 10:08

What if you start travelling at the speed of light at the time when both mans in Europe and Canada are awake and have time to play elma? For example during weekend at some 10-11 pm(?) in Europe. Then from your perspective nothing ever will change on Earth as long as you travel at the speed of light. Mans will always have weekend in Canada and Europe, probably till the end of the universe. :beer:
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tej
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Re: timezone trouble

Post by tej » 13 Nov 2019, 07:28

chris wrote:
7 Nov 2019, 10:08
(something about light speed)
very cool, we will have to try this. i'm online right now and nobody played my battle so a solution needs to be created soon!

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Re: timezone trouble

Post by nick-o-matic » 13 Nov 2019, 19:02

A serious problem, but your solution seems a bit overkill. If we just simply rotated the earth rotation axis in such way that the north pole moved to Oman and the south pole to Mexico, we would end up being in the same timezones with just few-hour differences.

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pawq
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Re: timezone trouble

Post by pawq » 14 Nov 2019, 01:01

aus & nz wrote:fuck me, right?

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tej
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Re: timezone trouble

Post by tej » 17 Nov 2019, 21:27

nick-o-matic wrote:
13 Nov 2019, 19:02
a serious problem, but your solution seems a bit overkill. if we just simply rotated the earth rotation axis in such way that the north pole moved to oman and the south pole to mexico, we would end up being in the same timezones with just few-hour differences.
super sick idea, but does definitely not allow aus and nz to have a great time.

i came up with another solution:

Image

just get very big world and put our world on top of it, in one time zone

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Re: timezone trouble

Post by Chris » 18 Nov 2019, 09:04

There are easier and actually workable solution. No need for any advanced technology at all. You just need to stop earth rotation at right moment, so both Canada and Europe face sun at all times. To do it you need all people to run in the direction of earth rotation. That force generated by running would eventually slow and stop rotation. When people reach sea we might need to move them back to the other end of continent using planes or some aircraft or use ships to move them to other continent so they won't run in wrong direction, but that's it about technology needed to stop rotation.

edit: fixed solution
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pawq
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Re: timezone trouble

Post by pawq » 19 Nov 2019, 00:56

They'd have to keep running forever to keep the earth still tho...

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tej
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Re: timezone trouble

Post by tej » 19 Nov 2019, 05:28

pawq wrote:
19 Nov 2019, 00:56
they'd have to keep running forever to keep the earth still tho...
not if we get the earth into tidal lock with the sun

Image

still, however, this solution really screws over our friends from the rear of the planet, like asians and australians.

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Re: timezone trouble

Post by AndrY » 19 Nov 2019, 23:25

thats all will not help.
We are living in 3-dimension world, and thats the problem. The planet is fuckng ball, impsy to do anything with it

Look at elma. This is like ideal imo! the sun is always shining! if you want to sleep you just can go to tunrnaround or such. or hide behind a tree4.
hmm you got the idea iimo
I just duno we need to remove height or depth?
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pawq
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Re: timezone trouble

Post by pawq » 20 Nov 2019, 01:46

AndrY wrote:
19 Nov 2019, 23:25
The planet is fuckng ball, impsy to do anything with it
What are you talking about

Image

Just need to stop teh sun, ez

Maybe if can create a very big cannon and shoot at the sun, it would stop it?? Or shoot at it from a different angle so that it goes further away and shines on the whole earth at once to avoid the aussie problem

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Re: timezone trouble

Post by Ruben » 20 Nov 2019, 05:32

Could be fun to calculate how big a cannon you would need to stop the earth's rotation.
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tej
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Re: timezone trouble

Post by tej » 21 Nov 2019, 01:27

right, if earth is truly flat we just need to move the sun a bit more far away. glad everybody is coming up with good solutions, because the sooner we solve this the better, as i am going mad.

Code: Select all

[00:00:50] (tej): wow this game could reall use an epic lev
[00:03:47] (Luther): yes
[00:05:01] (tej): okay cool
[00:05:51] (tej): making quick
[00:06:00] (tej): you should also play my prev
[00:06:06] (tej): almost nobody played
[00:06:07] (tej): and it was sick
:elma~1: Battle in xxx01715.lev started by tej, 20 mins
More info: https://elma.online/battles/147639
[00:09:35] (tej): omg lev 10
[00:09:44] (tej): tej best lev maker
[00:09:54] (tej): thanks tej
[00:10:01] (tej): you're the best player
[00:10:03] (tej): thanks tej
[00:13:32] (tej): wow playing this lev is just the epitome of enjoyment, tej
[00:13:43] (tej): i'm so happy to be here right now. it's also depressing knowing
[00:13:49] (tej): my life can only go down from this moment
[00:14:03] (tej): thanks tej, i'm honored to hear this lev brings you so much
[00:14:15] (tej): joy. i truly transcended to a state of pure euphoria while making
[00:14:22] (tej): it so it seems like it brought goodness all around
[00:14:30] (tej): that's amazng. goodnight tej
[00:14:33] (tej): night tej

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